Thing Not To Do Today If You're Sensible: burst.

Christmas is coming: in fact, it's due tomorrow. Hurray!

The excitement is building up and up inside me and I can't wait...

...well, all right. I can wait. I know I can, because I did it last year. And the year before.

Still, at my age I'm going to have to be careful, or I might do myself a mischief and burst or something.


In fact we should probably all be taking extra care: reading a calming book, say (The House of Seven Gables by Nathaniel Hawthorne is, as far as I know, the slowest book ever written), or we could try a cooling diet of cold porridge and still water. Or we could take up meditation, or darning.

On the other hand we could eat, drink and be merry and hope for the best.

If you hear a distant explosion at some point in the evening, don't worry.

Someone's probably just gone out with a bang.



Thing Not To Do Today If You're Sensible: burst. This word was berstan in Old English.