Thing Not To Do Today: be a snob.

Yes, I realise that all your neighbours are ghastly. I realise that they mow their lawns much too often, or not enough, and that they drop their aitches or use one in the most irritating manner when they really mean I.

I realise that their extension is far too big for the house, that their net curtains need cleaning, and that you can see right in if you go out after dark (and, honestly, if your wallpaper was in that state you'd think you'd want to keep it to yourself).

I realise that their taste in music is dreadful, their barbeques noxious, and their car-owning friends numerous beyond belief.

I realise that they make far too much of that baronet they once met, and that great-uncle's cousin who was said to be a runner for the Krays; and of course it's really not at all necessary to keep on and on about the Lodge.

Having said all that, I must point out that you're really quite odd and difficult to live with yourself, you know.

Well, aren't we all.

Thing Not To Do Today: be a snob.  This word appeared in the 1700s, when it meant shoemaker. By 1831 it had come to mean any member of the lower classes; by 1838 it meant someone with no taste; and by 1848 it had pretty much its present meaning, except that nowadays snobbery can be employed to disapprove of...well, every sort of people, really, not just the poor and vulgar.

I'm not sure if that's a move in the right direction or not.