Nuts and Bolts: say what you mean.

The English language was first cobbled together by English people.

Its manufacture was largely a matter of trial and error, together with a magpie-like stealing of pretty things from other languages.

English is still a work in progress, but luckily we now have half the people of the world chipping in to help get the thing working properly.

I say luckily because English people aren't really that good at speaking English.

Here, copied shamelessly from another part of the internet, is a list of some of the ways that English English is so often the opposite of clear and logical. 

WHAT THE BRITISH SAY	WHAT THE BRITISH MEAN	WHAT FOREIGNERS UNDERSTAND
I hear what you say	I disagree and do not want to discuss it further	He accepts my point of view
With the greatest respect	You are an idiot	He is listening to me
That's not bad	That's good	That's poor
That is a very brave proposal	You are insane	He thinks I have courage
Quite good	A bit disappointing	Quite good
I would suggest	Do it or be prepared to justify yourself	Think about the idea, but do what you like
Oh, incidentally/ by the way	The primary purpose of our discussion is	That is not very important
I was a bit disappointed that	I am annoyed that	It doesn't really matter
Very interesting	That is clearly nonsense	They are impressed
I'll bear it in mind	I've forgotten it already	They will probably do it
I'm sure it's my fault	It's your fault	Why do they think it was their fault?
You must come for dinner	It's not an invitation, I'm just being polite	I will get an invitation soon
I almost agree	I don't agree at all	He's not far from agreement
I only have a few minor comments	Please rewrite completely	He has found a few typos
Could we consider some other options	I don't like your idea	They have not yet decided

*     *      *    *    *

I suppose this does explain the rise of a special dialect called Business English, designed so that people across the globe can communicate with each other.

And, of course, it also explains why English people have such trouble speaking it.

Word To Use Today: incidentally. This word comes from the Latin incidens, an event, from the Latin incidere, to fall into.

Although no one seems to know who the author of the table above is, it's thought it may have originally been drawn up by a Dutch company to help employees working in the UK.