Thing To Be Today: démodé

I don't care if Breton stripes are the thing, I am not wearing them. They're smart and practical, and they look lovely on other people, but they make me feel as if I've leaned against a newly-painted fence. 

I'm not wearing any of those tops which look as if they've been attacked by sharks, either. I prefer my clothes to have as few holes in them as possible, which is why I keep my cashmere in a polythene bag.

And all those elasticated blouses designed to cling on round the upper arms? Forget it. The word is providing me with enough to worry about without having to stress about about my clothes falling down.

The six inch stilettos, though, are fine, as long as I'm happy to tower over everyone, don't mind being crippled with agony, and don't have to walk anywhere. Which I do, so I won't.

What else have we? The tropical prints are ridiculous in this English climate, the elephant prints suggest analogies which I am keen not to raise, and the A line dresses make even the models look ample.

So, yes, this year I am démodé.

Mind you, next year may bring us easy affordable wear-and-forget elegance, and then I'll be first in the queue.

Well, I will as long as it isn't orange, anyway.

Thing To Be Today: démodé. Of course if you're a slip of a young thing then fashion is especially for you (and I learnt to play the guitar when young entirely because I wanted one as a fashion accessory). Enjoy yourselves thoroughly!

This French word comes from dé, out of, and mode, style or fashion. The Latin modus means measure or manner.