A Christmas wish - a rant.

The English language has given us a huge variety of Christmas songs.

Some of them are secular, some of them are Christian, some are pagan. Some, like The Holly and The Ivy, are probably a bit of all three.

Some of the religious ones are quite silly (for instance, those ships that sail into Bethlehem even though it's not on the coast) and some of them are mostly made up.

Some Christmas songs suggest recipes, at least one of which is, frankly, lethal (Mistletoe and Wine, anybody?).

But of all the Christmas songs in the woods (and out of them) there is none so deeply fatuous and markedly unWizzard as the one that goes I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day.

No, really, think about it.

'What's for dinner, Mum?'

'Sprouts.'

'Mum, the batteries have run out!'

'We'll have to get some more when the shops...oh.'

'Who's that at the door?'

'Six slightly drunk members of the family we've been successfully avoiding all year.'

'So, what have you been doing this year?'

'Eating too much and...er...that's about it, really.'

No. Once a year is enough.

In fact, sometimes it seems plenty.

Word To Use Today: wizard. This word comes from wise. But they aren't, always, are they?