This blog is for everyone who uses words.

The ordinary-sized words are for everyone, but the big ones are especially for children.

Thursday, 5 December 2013

The Briefcase Killer: a rant.


As you guys know, Operation Woodkill has been on the radar for a while, now. (Thanks Tracy, just leave the plate. Help yourself to iron rations, guys, but try not to drop any crumbs, okay? We're still experiencing a major roach encroachment situation).

Right. So, the plan of campaign. The guerilla marketing strategy has achieved saturation - I repeat, achieved saturation - so a mention in dispatches to Tony, or, as he's generally known round here, Captain Composite, for his scouting mission to scope out the timber-door occupation rates of the district. That's not to forget his brothers-in-arms Frank and Stella, who piled in with the stats on side-panels, not to mention the bell-versus-knocker battle.

I can't say it's been pretty all the way, and we're having to backfill Harry after the Rottweiler Incident, but recruitment is priority one and we'll have new boots on the ground soonest.

Meanwhile, communication lines are always open if anyone has a request for air cover.

Any questions?

Then we'll draw this briefing to a close. Goodbye, gentlemen, and good luck with your mission.

Word To Use Today: Not One That Makes A Middle-Aged Fat and Slightly Balding Salesman Sound As If He Still Harbours Fantasies About Being In The SAS.

Bunny, perhaps? The word comes from the Scots Gaelic bun, which means the tail of a rabbit.

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