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Tuesday 10 March 2015

Thing Not To Do Today: assassinate someone.

Yes, I know it's tempting, but I really wouldn't advise going along the assassination route.

True, you'll get rid of an awkward bod or two, but just think of all those other famous assassins...

...hang on, assassins aren't even very famous, are they? Not nearly as famous as the people who were assassinated. No,
assassinating someone might result in a short-term rise in status, but that'll only be among people who approve of assassination; and, for obvious reasons, they're not the sort of people you want to encourage.

Still, I suppose you could always pretend someone else did the assassination.

And if the evidence against you is really compelling...well, you could always blame...aliens?

Little green ones, perhaps.

Thing Not To Do Today: assassinate someone. This word comes, delightfully, from the Latin assassīnus, from the Arabic hashshāshīn, those who eat hashish. The first assassins were members of a secret Muslim sect operating in Syria and Persia from about 1090 to 1256. They mostly assassinated Crusaders.


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